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3.2.05

Sarah linked to this awesome article concerning the 50 Most Loathsome People in America. From Ann Coulter, #50, to Kenneth Blackwell, #1.

My personal favorite:
34. Clarence Thomas
Crimes: On the wrong side of every Supreme Court decision since he got the job carrying Scalia’s golf clubs.
Smoking Gun: Angry black man routine during Anita Hill hearings was the most forced overacting this side of Keanu Reeves’ tantrum in Johnny Mnemonic.
Punishment: Led out of the Court in chains after inadvertently casting the deciding vote to reinstitute slavery.

Other than the ones that Sarah mentioned, I also particularly enjoyed:
18. Mel Gibson
Crimes: As with any religious nut, expects people to take his delusional bullshit seriously. Is obsessed with pain and suffering, as can be observed in the numerous Hulk Hogan style “now I’m really mad” scenes in nearly all of his movies, in which he endures medically impossible levels of bodily punishment before rising to vanquish his cartoonish foes. This is such a routine motif in Gibson’s work that we half expected Jesus to jump off the cross and start kicking Jewish ass in The Passion of the Christ. More historically revisionist than Oliver Stone.
Smoking Gun: Shot about 11 times in the climax of Lethal Weapon II, yet still saunters off with his partner as the credits roll, apparently not in need of medical attention.
Punishment: Neurodegenerative illness that could have been cured through stem cell research.

And #3. (Speaking of which, what *is* Julia wearing to the Oscars??)

2 Comments:

  • At 12:53 AM, Blogger Sarah said…

    I wanted to include them, along with Toby Keith, but I thought I might be quoting too much at that point, so I left them out. Damn, those were really accurate descriptions, #3 included.

    And I'm late with this, but a big fucking "ARGH!" to the Viagra/birth control bullshit. That's all I will say. Otherwise, I think some of the veins sticking out of my forehead will burst if I continue.

    And good job on your review!

     
  • At 1:41 AM, Blogger CC Baxter said…

    The description of the Bush's made me laugh (especially, Laura's. Not to be offensive, but can't help thinking that each time she's shown on TV either as a show shot or in an interview).

    Your right, I am a loathsome person.....

     

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