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11.11.04

Our New AG

So, now that I'm glad that Ashcroft is gone, it's time to hate the new Attorney General.

From Alterman:


Can anyone be a worse attorney general than John Ashcroft?
Meet Alberto Gonzales, who never met a provision of the Geneva Convention he
couldn't find a way to ignore. Congratulations Mr. President. I promise to stop
misunderestmating you, right now.


My friend's response:
I guess we can hope that he'll be more
obsessed with abusing the human rights of non-Americans than Americans. Christ,
you want to talk about diminished expectations. I'm hoping against hope that our
new Attorney General, the top law enforcement official in the land, is only
abusive towards foreigners.
And the South's response to Fuckthesouth.com? Kick the North out. Anyone want to wager how long it would take before the "United States of America" would become a third world country, without the states that actually HAVE money?? Again, my friend's response:

Ok, let's look at the numbskull's summation of why the Red US would be better.

A downsized, post-expulsion United States still would be geographically big enough (and personally generous enough) to welcome millions of authentic refugees from the ousted former states, real Americans who crave lower taxes, smaller government, safer neighborhoods, more secure borders, greater moral leadership, and all the other aspects of a markedly better society-- one that spawns harmony, not cacophony; excellence, not dependence; justice, not histrionics; education, not brainwashing; enterprise, not welfare, and Godliness, not devilishness. As for the dozen ex-American states, they could always petition the UN and EU for foreign aid.

One at a time:

"...smaller government..." The size of the federal government increased massively under Bush. It is Republicans that want to put the government in your bedroom, listen to your phone conversations, and track your internet use with increasingly less judicial oversight. It is Republicans that are pushing hardest to decide what belongs on TV and what doesn't (rather than the free market, which they claim to worship).

"...safer neighborhoods..." Most American neighborhoods in both the red and blue states are safe. Crime is one of the phoniest bugaboos in politics. Crime hasn't been this low in decades. Furthermore, crime is virtually always higher in densely populated areas; most of the largest cities lie in blue states. There's not bound to be much crime in Bumf*ck, Nebraska when the population is 78.

"...more secure borders..." The major flood points along the Mexican border (which I presume is what he's talking about here) have been in states more often in Republican control than Democratic. Here's a little secret: the people who would most aggressively fight laws that would truly discourage the hiring of illegals (and therefore attack the reason they come in the first place) are overwhelmingly Republican - farmers.

"...greater moral leadership..." The Reagan administration suffered more scandal and criminal indictments than almost any other. They traded arms for hostages at a time when they insisted they wouldn't negotiate with terrorists. The long list of lies during the current administration need not be mentioned here. The heads of the many scandalized companies (Enron et al) are almost all Republican or contributed heavily to the Republican party.

"...harmony, not cacophony..." It is not the Red that seeks harmony for they are not interested in letting people live their lives as long as they harm no one else. As I've mentioned before, the real "war" is not simply two sides who differ on various issues. It's that we are perfectly content to allow them to live their lives as they see fit. They will not return that courtesy.

"...excellence, not dependence..." Good point. I'd start out with not giving preferential treatment in prep school and college admissions based on family connections rather than academic merit. Oh wait...

"...justice, not histrionics..." Like detaining hundreds of "the worst of the worst terrorists" without trial or even counsel, only to summarily release them by the dozens. Like refusing (with one prominent exception) to stop executing people when it's clear that the system is broken and at grave risk of killing innocent people.

"...education, not brainwashing..." I would love to see the test scores of the red VS blue states ten years after a secession. Creationism isn't brainwashing?! Abstinence-only sex ed isn't brainwashing?

"...enterprise, not welfare..." I agree. We'll start with farm subsidies and corporations that currently don't pay any taxes. I'm sorry, are you choking Mr. Republican?

"...Godliness, not devilishness..." The red would certainly corner the God market. I'm still waiting for my "Satanists of America" membership pack to come in.

And the biggest laugh of all: "...they could always petition the UN and EU for foreign aid." Hmm. California alone would be the sixth largest economy in the world were it a country. It is the number one agricultural state, number four in oil production, the center of the American (and really world) technology sector, the center of the American entertainment industry (movies, music, television, videogames, porn are all centered in California, the addition of New York would take out virtually the entire entertainment industry). Much of the country's aerospace industry, particularly in the research and military sectors are in California and Washington. Add the other's various economic contributions, and you would be left with a small but economically powerful nation. The remaining red states would still have some ag and oil and a bit of high tech, but where are they going to continue to get properly educated people for high tech jobs when they are openly hostile to science? Bio tech would be virtually non-existent in the Red USA; evolution is the basis for all biological sciences, stem cell research is a no no, as is human cloning. That he say this is indicative of either a flippant snottiness or colossal ignorance.

2 Comments:

  • At 10:17 AM, Blogger Erinna said…

    RE: education. Gee, I wonder why it's so ridiculously easy for a person with a teaching degree from a northern college to get a teaching job in the south...

     
  • At 2:13 AM, Blogger CC Baxter said…

    (from the Northwest...and recently Pacific)

    Go Blue! (actually that sounds more like a red comment, probably should take that back.....)

     

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