Bush To Google Future Nominees
Again, Andy Borowitz amuses me. Not to mention the fact that I love Google. The entire Kerik thing is humerous. I am just amazed at things that "don't occur" to people. Like, "if I'm paying under the table, is there a possibility that she is an illegal" and "If I get a blow job under the table, is that cheating on my wife?" How do they come to the answers "no" and "it depends on what your definition of is is."
BUSH TO GOOGLE FUTURE NOMINEES
Kerik + Nanny Yields 20,000 Web Pages
After the embarrassing flap over the nomination of Bernard Kerik as the new Homeland Security Secretary, President George W. Bush announced today that the White House would take the extraordinary step of Googling all future Cabinet nominees.
"Looking back on it, I wish we had Googled Bernard Kerik," the president said today. "It would've saved us a lot of grief all around."
Mr. Bush said that he would have Googled Mr. Kerik earlier, but that he only learned of the existence of the Google search engine on Friday, long after the Kerik appointment had been made public.
"I guess I have a lot to learn about the Internets," Mr. Bush said.
Instead of silencing critics, however, the president's comments only emboldened those who had been urging the Administration to Google prospective nominees for months.
According to those critics, a simple Google search using the words "Kerik + Nanny", for example, yields over 20,000 separate web pages, while a search using the words "Kerik + Conflict + Interest" yields over 900,000 pages.
At the firestorm over the failure to Google Mr. Kerik raged, White House spokesman Scott McClellan denied that the Administration did not do a thorough job of vetting the former police commissioner: "We asked Jeeves if he was okay, and Jeeves said he was."
Mr. McClellan added that the White House is now considering nominating only candidates who do not have a nanny, but added, "That would mean picking a Democrat."
Elsewhere, the Labor Department announced that unemployment surged in the last month but attributed much of the increase to the Bush cabinet.
BUSH TO GOOGLE FUTURE NOMINEES
Kerik + Nanny Yields 20,000 Web Pages
After the embarrassing flap over the nomination of Bernard Kerik as the new Homeland Security Secretary, President George W. Bush announced today that the White House would take the extraordinary step of Googling all future Cabinet nominees.
"Looking back on it, I wish we had Googled Bernard Kerik," the president said today. "It would've saved us a lot of grief all around."
Mr. Bush said that he would have Googled Mr. Kerik earlier, but that he only learned of the existence of the Google search engine on Friday, long after the Kerik appointment had been made public.
"I guess I have a lot to learn about the Internets," Mr. Bush said.
Instead of silencing critics, however, the president's comments only emboldened those who had been urging the Administration to Google prospective nominees for months.
According to those critics, a simple Google search using the words "Kerik + Nanny", for example, yields over 20,000 separate web pages, while a search using the words "Kerik + Conflict + Interest" yields over 900,000 pages.
At the firestorm over the failure to Google Mr. Kerik raged, White House spokesman Scott McClellan denied that the Administration did not do a thorough job of vetting the former police commissioner: "We asked Jeeves if he was okay, and Jeeves said he was."
Mr. McClellan added that the White House is now considering nominating only candidates who do not have a nanny, but added, "That would mean picking a Democrat."
Elsewhere, the Labor Department announced that unemployment surged in the last month but attributed much of the increase to the Bush cabinet.
3 Comments:
At 5:32 PM, Curtis said…
I google everyone who I consider dating. Googling myself, however, brings up nothing. I'm google-proof.
At 3:22 AM, Ontario Emperor said…
And that's ALBERT GORE'S Internets, thank you very much.
At 10:31 AM, Matthew said…
The whole Kerik debacle is a rather humorous egg on the face of the Bush administration, although I see where they've (surprise, surprise) deflect the blame onto Kerik, because he didn't come clean about his nanny (and everything else, apparently).
Now, while I don't absolve Kerik of his alleged shadiness when it comes to matters of marriage, money and immigration, I do absolve him of being interviewed by a bunch of jokers who can't even do a thorough, investigative background check to see whether or not he's been completely honest with him.
Come to think of it, Kerik and this administration deserve each other. But the American people don't deserve them.
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